Well my mom has been acting, different, lately. She's been more into talking to me bout baby stuff and such. The other day she asked what her grandma name is going to be. Dad's the same mostly. I got to see Shaun this whole weekend though, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I was happy :)
So my ultrasound is June 11, my sister's 13th birthday. June 12 is my next appointment. Shaun only could get off for the 11th :( So Faison's coming with me on the 12th.
Senior pictures are the end of July and I'm wanting to do a belly dancing shot with my belly showing (hopefully I'll actually have one by then).
I'm starting some new crochet projects. A tam, a baby blanket, a bikini top I'm going to decorate for a dance top, and a tote I haven't started yet. I want to start tie dyeing baby clothes like onsies and socks and hats. www.freewebs.com/hemp-wear-n-more
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
What A Hell...
Friday I went to see LaMaire (Not sure if that’s the right spelling) because I was having bad abdominal pains, especially on my right side. I’m thinking it was just round ligament pains. Tylenol helps it and my headaches, which are getting more frequent. Monday was my actual scheduled appointment at 3:20. Shaun was there but showed up late because of school traffic and the rain so he missed the heartbeat since my mom was in a hurry. Then I had to get blood drawn to screen for Down Syndrome and Cystic Fibrosis. The lady (Pam) was great it barely hurt and went real fast, unlike the Naval hospital. LaMaire said I’m not gaining enough weight and I need more protein to do it. I’ve gained four pounds in four months. I’m supposed to get to at least 25 gained by the end.
I haven’t been sure I’ve felt any movement in about two weeks, until Monday. The baby was VERY active, almost the whole day. When I went to my younger sister’s band concert the baby danced. I think loud external noises like multiple people talking or music is the trigger, but who knows. My next appointment is in 4-5 weeks and the anatomical ultrasound is supposed to be before that.
Well, I already have been feeling that I need to move out, but now it’s definite. My dad doesn’t want to bother talking to me about any of it and doesn’t think I need him. Mom thinks if the two of us talked it out it would solve everything. It won’t, not that he’ll talk. My grades have dropped and I’m struggling. The emotional strain is almost too much for me to bear. The energy emanating in my house is enough to make me be in a constant gloom, and I know it’s not good for me nor baby. I can only see Shaun on the weekends (one day) and it’s getting irritating. It hurts to think I actually have to leave, but I know I have to do something, and this is all I can think of to let everyone cool down and maybe they’ll realize what they’ve done to me.
My Nana knows too (my mom’s mom), and is on my side. That’s reassuring. I don’t think anyone else in the family’s been told, which I don’t know if that’s good or not. Probably not. Our trip to Oregon is mid-June to mid-July and it might be my last time to see any of them for awhile, but I don’t know if they’ll let me go if I move out before June.
We’ve found a place that we can afford on HWY 24. Rent is $400 a month for a one bed one bath and we only have to pay for electric and the cable/phone. I can catch the bus to or from school too. Wish me luck.
Oh, I’ve found a mentor for my senior project, Kaitlyn. I’m doing Prenatal Belly Dancing. I’m really excited about it. I've also started getting more into Sea Magick. Found abook at the Compass Rose on the Island on it. I'm definitely feeling the Water Mage/Sea Witch pull :)
I haven’t been sure I’ve felt any movement in about two weeks, until Monday. The baby was VERY active, almost the whole day. When I went to my younger sister’s band concert the baby danced. I think loud external noises like multiple people talking or music is the trigger, but who knows. My next appointment is in 4-5 weeks and the anatomical ultrasound is supposed to be before that.
Well, I already have been feeling that I need to move out, but now it’s definite. My dad doesn’t want to bother talking to me about any of it and doesn’t think I need him. Mom thinks if the two of us talked it out it would solve everything. It won’t, not that he’ll talk. My grades have dropped and I’m struggling. The emotional strain is almost too much for me to bear. The energy emanating in my house is enough to make me be in a constant gloom, and I know it’s not good for me nor baby. I can only see Shaun on the weekends (one day) and it’s getting irritating. It hurts to think I actually have to leave, but I know I have to do something, and this is all I can think of to let everyone cool down and maybe they’ll realize what they’ve done to me.
My Nana knows too (my mom’s mom), and is on my side. That’s reassuring. I don’t think anyone else in the family’s been told, which I don’t know if that’s good or not. Probably not. Our trip to Oregon is mid-June to mid-July and it might be my last time to see any of them for awhile, but I don’t know if they’ll let me go if I move out before June.
We’ve found a place that we can afford on HWY 24. Rent is $400 a month for a one bed one bath and we only have to pay for electric and the cable/phone. I can catch the bus to or from school too. Wish me luck.
Oh, I’ve found a mentor for my senior project, Kaitlyn. I’m doing Prenatal Belly Dancing. I’m really excited about it. I've also started getting more into Sea Magick. Found abook at the Compass Rose on the Island on it. I'm definitely feeling the Water Mage/Sea Witch pull :)
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Hoopin' Mama
Well, i finally got back into hooping. yup, found her, dusted her off, and spent at least an hour outside learning some tricks. Actually bout to go out in a bit :) Practiced some hand hooping, which they feel bruised haha, and lifting from the waist (which is very hard). I joined the tribe.net group Hoopin' Mamas. (Here's my tribe.net http://people.tribe.net/c94ee6a1-f430-4ca0-b3d2-4a446ffc90d4 ) it was so, meditative. And fun. It put a spark in my ill mood I've had the past few weeks from constantly argueing with my parents. I'm going to try and videotape myself and upload it when I can.
P.s.
Might be moving out. We're looking at a one bed one bath heading into Swansboro $400 rent a month. It looks like one of those old plantation houses with the white collumn pillars.
P.s.
Might be moving out. We're looking at a one bed one bath heading into Swansboro $400 rent a month. It looks like one of those old plantation houses with the white collumn pillars.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Accident
Well yesterday I got into an accident. My very first too. I was on my way home from my boyfriend's house with my friend Faison (she was driving) and we were sitting at the corner of Starling and HWY 172 to turn left onto 172. It was about 7:37. We pulled to a stop, looked left, looked right. Coming from the right was green car towing a trailer with a canoe or something on it and were turning into the turn lane to turn onto Starling. They were about 100 150 ft back and slowing so Faison was going to turn. She says she swore she didn't see anything to the left, I don't know if she looked or not. 7:38 about. She started to turn the wheel, pressed the gas, I looked up, saw the red car and then bam we hit. We were slammed to a stop and whiplashed forward. I swear my vision blurred. Not everything going by, but my actual vision. When I came back up from the whiplash I saw the red car go into the ditch on the other side of the road. We weren't going fast enough for either the seatbelts to react or for airbag deployment.
We both just sat there for a second and then Faison started freaking out because she couldn't find her phone. Mine was in my lap and I remember not being able to see very well but notreally noticing. It was like the edges of my vision were black and I was kind of detatched until I started to talk. She went to get out and I told her to try and back the car up out of the middle of the road. She threw it in reverse and the whole car creaked in agony and went a couple inches. I said screw it and she parked and turned it off. When I went to open my door it only opened about 6 inches before it creaked and groaned and protested so I kicked it open and climbed out. That's when I noiced the red car had slammed into the green car before rolling into the ditch. Or maybe the green car hit the red one, I'm not sure. Me and Faison walked ver to the side of the road and that's when I thought of the baby and my adrenaline hit. I started shaking and trying not to cry and kept holding myself. People startd parking and walking by to the other cars and asking if we were alright. We called my dad, her mom, then Shaun who came with his mom.
I knew the girl in the red car, she had a cut on her forehead by the hair line and she slit the skin between thumb and forefinger on her right hand and said she had to to get stitches, and she had the baby in the back (who was fine) and some guy in the car with her. There was another lady in the green car who went with the ambulance to get checked at the hospital. I was scared shitless and so was Shaun. He said he's never been that scared in his life. The EMS guy said that I should be fine since I've had a healthy pregnancy so far but if anything feels abnormal to go get checked. They told us we'd have some sore muscles for a few days which I'm a bit stiff in the right side and the back of my neck mostly. I was praying to the Goddess so hard till I went to bed. I'd take any pain if She'd keep the baby safe.
I'm pretty sure I'm ok, everything feels fine and Faison's feeling real guilty, but me and Shaun have been trying to ease her up. I made her laugh at least :)
We both just sat there for a second and then Faison started freaking out because she couldn't find her phone. Mine was in my lap and I remember not being able to see very well but notreally noticing. It was like the edges of my vision were black and I was kind of detatched until I started to talk. She went to get out and I told her to try and back the car up out of the middle of the road. She threw it in reverse and the whole car creaked in agony and went a couple inches. I said screw it and she parked and turned it off. When I went to open my door it only opened about 6 inches before it creaked and groaned and protested so I kicked it open and climbed out. That's when I noiced the red car had slammed into the green car before rolling into the ditch. Or maybe the green car hit the red one, I'm not sure. Me and Faison walked ver to the side of the road and that's when I thought of the baby and my adrenaline hit. I started shaking and trying not to cry and kept holding myself. People startd parking and walking by to the other cars and asking if we were alright. We called my dad, her mom, then Shaun who came with his mom.
I knew the girl in the red car, she had a cut on her forehead by the hair line and she slit the skin between thumb and forefinger on her right hand and said she had to to get stitches, and she had the baby in the back (who was fine) and some guy in the car with her. There was another lady in the green car who went with the ambulance to get checked at the hospital. I was scared shitless and so was Shaun. He said he's never been that scared in his life. The EMS guy said that I should be fine since I've had a healthy pregnancy so far but if anything feels abnormal to go get checked. They told us we'd have some sore muscles for a few days which I'm a bit stiff in the right side and the back of my neck mostly. I was praying to the Goddess so hard till I went to bed. I'd take any pain if She'd keep the baby safe.
I'm pretty sure I'm ok, everything feels fine and Faison's feeling real guilty, but me and Shaun have been trying to ease her up. I made her laugh at least :)
Friday, April 10, 2009
Heartbeat
Went to my physical exam appointment thing on Monday. Shaun actually got to go to that one (yay!). It was him me and my mom. I didn't have to get a pap smear (thank the Gods) but I will around December of 2010. The midwife said that they've found out they only have to do them every 3 years, not every year like they thought they needed to. I did have to have an internal exam though and she had to swab my cervix. Wasn't too bad, not too awkward. She was really nice. Then she had to check the baby's heartbeat so she used a Doppler- it's like those microphones attached to a speaker you play with when you're little. It took her for ever to find the lil thing. She was all over my right side and Sunday I had felt flutterbys on my left side between my bellybutton and hip and was gonna tell her to check there (not sure if it had been baby or digestion) and she went there on her own and bam, found it. Said it was around 170 which was a big jump from the ultrasound beat (156) but still healthy. Shaun was ecstatic he got to hear. It meant a lot to have him there.
Oh, and apparently the OBGYN looked at my pictures and said that I was a week ahead (so I was 13 weeks and 4 days on Monday instead of 12 weeks and 4 days according to my last period date). And, not only am I negative for all the weird bugs and stuff from the blood test, I found out I'm O-, which means if Shaun is something+ I'll have to get an Rh+ (I think) shot so my body doesn't attack the baby as foreign. I have another appointment a month from Monday for more blood work to test for down syndrome and something about osteo-stuff. Yay. More needles. Then we'll schedule for my next ultrasound to see what the baby is! (If it’ll be cooperative :P)
Yesterday I hit (according to the OBGYN’s dating) 14 weeks J “Your little one is currently between 3.2 to 4.5 inches (from crown to rump) and weighs in at around .9 ounces.”
Oh, and apparently the OBGYN looked at my pictures and said that I was a week ahead (so I was 13 weeks and 4 days on Monday instead of 12 weeks and 4 days according to my last period date). And, not only am I negative for all the weird bugs and stuff from the blood test, I found out I'm O-, which means if Shaun is something+ I'll have to get an Rh+ (I think) shot so my body doesn't attack the baby as foreign. I have another appointment a month from Monday for more blood work to test for down syndrome and something about osteo-stuff. Yay. More needles. Then we'll schedule for my next ultrasound to see what the baby is! (If it’ll be cooperative :P)
Yesterday I hit (according to the OBGYN’s dating) 14 weeks J “Your little one is currently between 3.2 to 4.5 inches (from crown to rump) and weighs in at around .9 ounces.”
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
A Little Catching Up
Hey everyone. It's been awhile since I've been able to post anything, and trust me, the time has not gone by uneventful. Since my last post we told my mom (him and I together) and she then told my dad (via e-mail). Let's just say that things haven't gone over too well and things are still almost at full boil, but gradually cooling to simmering. My dad keeps on with the idea that my life is ruined, my future he had dreamed for destroyed, etc. etc. Both of my parents are also insistent on my continued removal from my boyfriend (now fiance, since the day we found out :D ). Every new thing I learn every new bit of information I grab i try to share with both him and my mom. But, every time I bring up anything to do with anything on the subject my mother gives me this look that's a cross between "Please just shut up and let me think this isn't happening," "You're really grating on my nerves and I'm NOT happy with you so don't think easy converssation on it is going to make me feel any better," and "I really, really, really am thinking you did this on purpose." It's, irritating.
My dad even went as far as to e-mail me saying if I wanted to go to prom this Saturday (my junior prom) that I had to go and get an abortion. I gave him an ear-full of a lot I'm sure he didn't want to hear or expected to hear. Then he changed his mind and said I could go, but that it didn't change anything he'd said (which was a lot).
I finally got to the doctor today. There was a group orientation, a dating scan (my first ultrasound), and I had to give 7 vials of blood and a urine sample for lab work. According to my last period I should be at 11 weeks and 5 days today and be 12 weeks Thursday. According to the ultrasound I'm already at 12 weeks. So my due date is still roughly estimated as and 15 or 16 of October still. I'll upload the ultrasound pictures when I can get a hold of my sister's scanner. When she first put the scanner thing on my belly the first image that came up was its hands. Then I got to see the whole body, the heart beat (and hear it), and see it move. Once she turned the speakers on and the heartbeat rang out I started to cry and couldn’t stop. My mom didn’t let my boyfriend come to the first appointment and I didn’t know that a dating scan meant an ultrasound, so I was upset because he should have been there, that and it’s so, emotional… so, indescribable it is seeing that little human being that’s growing inside you for the first time, seeing it move and hearing its heart (which was 156 bpm). It’s a hell of a lot different than seeing someone else’s on TV.
After that we made my next appointment (which is my full physical and when I meet the doctor and probably my midwife) which is Monday at 3:40. He’ll be going to that one. That’s when I found out that not only are the naval hospital’s midwives unqualified for homebirths, but the naval hospital doesn’t have the facilities for a water birth, so I have to figure out how I’m going to do that. I’ll have to have a ‘civilian’ midwife who does home water births but I don’t know if my dad will change the Tricare so I can do that.
It took about 3 hours of cleaning my room with my mom to get her convinced to let him over for a few minutes to see the pictures. At first she didn’t want to let him come over but I finally got her to. It’s, going to be hard. I have no idea whatsoever how it’s going to be after my dad comes home, which is Sunday (Saturday’s prom).
My dad even went as far as to e-mail me saying if I wanted to go to prom this Saturday (my junior prom) that I had to go and get an abortion. I gave him an ear-full of a lot I'm sure he didn't want to hear or expected to hear. Then he changed his mind and said I could go, but that it didn't change anything he'd said (which was a lot).
I finally got to the doctor today. There was a group orientation, a dating scan (my first ultrasound), and I had to give 7 vials of blood and a urine sample for lab work. According to my last period I should be at 11 weeks and 5 days today and be 12 weeks Thursday. According to the ultrasound I'm already at 12 weeks. So my due date is still roughly estimated as and 15 or 16 of October still. I'll upload the ultrasound pictures when I can get a hold of my sister's scanner. When she first put the scanner thing on my belly the first image that came up was its hands. Then I got to see the whole body, the heart beat (and hear it), and see it move. Once she turned the speakers on and the heartbeat rang out I started to cry and couldn’t stop. My mom didn’t let my boyfriend come to the first appointment and I didn’t know that a dating scan meant an ultrasound, so I was upset because he should have been there, that and it’s so, emotional… so, indescribable it is seeing that little human being that’s growing inside you for the first time, seeing it move and hearing its heart (which was 156 bpm). It’s a hell of a lot different than seeing someone else’s on TV.
After that we made my next appointment (which is my full physical and when I meet the doctor and probably my midwife) which is Monday at 3:40. He’ll be going to that one. That’s when I found out that not only are the naval hospital’s midwives unqualified for homebirths, but the naval hospital doesn’t have the facilities for a water birth, so I have to figure out how I’m going to do that. I’ll have to have a ‘civilian’ midwife who does home water births but I don’t know if my dad will change the Tricare so I can do that.
It took about 3 hours of cleaning my room with my mom to get her convinced to let him over for a few minutes to see the pictures. At first she didn’t want to let him come over but I finally got her to. It’s, going to be hard. I have no idea whatsoever how it’s going to be after my dad comes home, which is Sunday (Saturday’s prom).
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